Staying silent with your partner is not always a sign of distance or discomfort: moments of natural quiet can strengthen the relationship, increasing the sense of intimacy, mutual understanding and couple satisfaction
Who said that in a couple you always have to speak? A new study shows that share moments of silence with the partner It can be the secret of a happy and lasting relationship.
Have you ever been next to the person you love without feeling the need to say anything? According to a search for theUniversity of Readingpublished in the magazine Motivation and Emotionthese moments of quiet complicity They are much more important than you think. These are not embarrassing or tension silence, but a deep understanding that does not need words.
Scholars have discovered that couples who experience natural silencethat is, without embarrassment or tensions, they are more satisfied with their relationship. “Imagine two partners who look at each other with affection and understanding, without saying anything. Or, on the contrary, a look that communicates disappointment and detachment. In both cases, silence speaks more than a thousand words, “explain the researchers.
Silence as a form of communication
To better understand the role of Silence in the couplethe team led four studies. Participants were asked to remember an episode of silence in their relationship and to explain the reason for that moment. Another group instead thought of episodes of silence lived in toxic relationships of the past.
The result? Silence can have different meanings depending on the motivation that generates it. If it is used as a punishment or as a sign of fear in communicating, generates frustration and emotional distance. But when he lived naturally and without forcing, he was associated with satisfaction, intimacy and couple well -being.
The researchers identified four main reasons behind silence:
- The partner wanted to avoid the conversation
- Speak could have triggered a discussion
- Silence was used as punishment
- Both simply wanted enjoy the moment without words
When silence is A conscious and shared choicehelps the couple to feel more united. It is not necessary to always speak to feel close: Sometimes it is enough to simply be present for each other.
The value of silence in lasting relationships
Also Claudia Haaseexpert in couple dynamics at Northwestern University And not involved in the study, he underlined the importance of research: “This theme was not very detailed, but shared silence can be a form of very powerful connection”.
According to the expert, moments of silence lived positively – maybe during a walk, a trip by car or listening to a song loved by both – can strengthen the couple’s bond and increase the sense of intimacy.
There Weinstein net psychologistthe main author of the study, added:
We must not fill every space with words. Moments of silence can be powerful connection opportunities.
